Why is this happening to me alone?

Are you in a very happy mood? Have you achieved something great today? Are you extremely jubilant and excited for whatever reason? Have your girl friend accepted your proposal recently? Are you a highly optimistic person? If your answer for any of the above is yes, then bye friend, read the rest of this article on some other day.

Are you really pissed off? Is your project manager screwing you? Is your girl friend annoying you? Have you faced some failure in the recent past? Are you a frustrated job seeker? Are you a pessimist? Do you consider you as a loser? If yes, then come on friends, this article is for you. Continue Reading.

In recent days, I am hearing few statements more frequently from many of my friends. They are, ‘Why is this happening to me alone?’ ‘What wrong have I done to suffer like this?’. I empathize for those who say these statements. Ironically, I too had said it few times. But if analyzed deeper, we can understand the reality of life.

What problems do we face more frequently? Topping the list is love failure, followed by job dissatisfaction and lot more follows. Immediately we come to the conclusion that we are the most unlucky person in the world; we are destined to undergo maximum hardships, we blame the god, and sometimes question the existence of god and so on.

It is true that we are unlucky sometimes. Things don’t go in the way we thought. Even putting lot of effort doesn’t bring success. We don’t get what we yearn for. But is that the end of the road? Immediately, should we come to conclusion about being unlucky? I think no.

Have you undergone all the miseries underwent by all the human beings in this world? Without that how can you say you suffer most? There are definitely people in worse situations.

Have you ever felt, how it will be to lose your eye sight? You will never be able to watch your favorite film, sports, TV soaps, etc. You don’t know how a color is, how a shape looks like…You cannot do anything alone. For everything, you need a support. Have we suffered more than these blind people?

Have you ever felt, how it will be to lose your hearing power? There will not be any favorite albums to hear. You will never be able to hear anything, let alone your favorite music. Empty play list in media player or even uninstall that software. It might not be useful anymore. Have we suffered more than those deaf people?

Tougher and worse scenarios are still there. Have you ever imagine how you will behave when you come to know, you are going to die. What will you do, when your closest kin is counting his/her last days? What will you do when police is searching you for some mistakes which you didn’t do? What will you do, when you are deprived of even your basic necessities like home, shelter like Tamils in Sri lanka. Have you ever imagined the above situations? I am sure most of you would reply no.

I have jotted down few worst situations a person can face. Do I sound pessimistic? No; Not at all – Standing in sun will help you to understand the pleasure of standing in shade. My objective is also similar. I just want to stress the point saying there are people who suffer more than us. So, what to do next? As there are more sufferings, let us get adjust to our current small difficulties and experience them all. Again, a big NO is my answer.

Work on to solve your problems. My point is that, do not just ponder about your problems. It will no way help to solve or reduce your difficulties. Live the life to the fullest. If you are an agnostic or atheist, skip the next sentence. Every day is a gift from god. Enjoy each and every moment of your life to the maximum. Always think about the positives that had happened to you. Be more optimistic. May be a better one is waiting for you in the future.

Another major problem which we face today is comparison syndrome. Comparing with someone and envy it. My friend has a better salary, he has a bigger house, he has a beautiful girl friend, and he gets more than what he deserves. All of these are the common reasons for being jealous – If you are not like the one I have mentioned in the previous line, bear with me for few more lines. May be your lucky friend is the son of god or whatsoever. What will you get by just fuming over it? Nothing, isn’t it? Then why do you spend time in something which is worthless for you?

Let us take an example. You are waiting for a local bus. Suddenly, it starts raining cats and dogs. No shelter there. Standing under a tree, you get completely wet. All the buses are full of people. No space to even squeeze in. After close to 15 min, an AC bus comes. Thankfully, because of its high ticket price, only few people were there. You enter into it.

Now, what will you say about the above situation. Is there anything positive about this incident? Nothing, isn’t it? You had woken up seeing a wrong face or might be you have seen the mirror. The rain could have started after you have reached home. Now you have suffered. This is one way of looking at it.

Is there another way to look at it? What would have happened if that AC bus had not come? You could have stood there for hours, completely drowned in rain. Next day, you could have caught cold which slowly becomes fever and so on. So guys, there is a positive side in everything, except if some of your dear ones had kicked the bucket. Some highly stoic, optimistic person can even find something positive in it. May be I couldn’t.

All the above ideas are said in a short and crisp jargon “All is well” or rather “Aaaal is welllll” after ‘3 Idiots’. Seriously it is a great jargon. Just write it in big bold letters, paste it in your rooms and things may change for the better. If you want to have a longer version, take this. “What had happened is for good, what is happening is also for good and what is about to happen will also be good”, small translation from baghvat geeta.

I have written about the comparison syndrome. Comparison can also be useful. Compare yourself with differently able, unfortunate children of god – again atheist/agnostic people forgive me. You will realize how lucky are you to have all the parts of your body working fine, to have a very caring family and so on. Don’t just stop with comparison. Try to help these unfortunate children. Atleast spend ten percent of your income towards charity. There are large number of service organizations, find the genuine one and support them. If you are so much interested, start your own.

Finally, an article should have a conclusion, isn’t it? So, here is the conclusion. If there are some chances to overcome your problem, do with full heart. This may not be possible in all cases. In case your Girl Friend had left you and married someone, you cannot do anything more in this chapter. Close the old chapter and try to start a new one. Rather you had flunked your exams, you had goofed up in some dance competition, you were thrown out of the job; there is always a chance to get back what you lost. Strive hard, just focus on what you want. Write your desire in some sheet and paste it where you can see often. Nothing is impossible in this world. Don’t waste your time in worrying. Sadness and gladness succeed each other. Come on guys, buckle your shoes down, success is waiting in the corridor for you and remember for optimistic, hard working people, success knocks the door more than once.

Are you still a pessimist? Then just mail me to tcevadivel@yahoo.co.in; May be I should improve my writing skills. Have a nice day or rather have a nice future.